Quotes|Stories|Poems|Recipes (v2)

FEBRUARY 1999

LIFE’S DEEP THOUGHTS

Thanx to: Richard Bachman,

The beginning of anxiety is the end of faith, and the beginning of true faith is the end of anxiety

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Doubt sees the obstacles,
Faith sees the way;
Doubt sees the darkest night,
Faith sees the day;
Doubt dreads to take a step,
Faith soars on high;
Doubt questions, “Who believes?”
Faith answers, “I”

Author Unknown

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A genius is someone who shoots at a target no one else sees, and hits it!

Thank God every morning when you get up that you have something to do that day which must be done whether you like it or not. Being forced to work and forced to do your best will breed in you temperance and self-control; diligence and strength of will; cheerfulness and content; and a hundred other virtues the idle will never know.

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for!

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always ‘wins’ – not through strength, but through perseverance.

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AMISH WEDDING RECIPE:
2 cups love
1 cup kindness
1 cup appreciation
3 cups plesant companionship
3 teaspoons deserving praise
1 teaspoon carefully chosen advise
1 cup cheerfulness
1 pinch of sorrow

Blend 2 cups of love and 1 cup of kindness. Add alternately, in small portions, 1 cup of appreciation and 3 cups of plesant companionship into which have been sifted 3 teaspoons of deserving praise. Flavor with 1 teaspoon of carefully chosen advise. Lightly fold in 1 cup of cheerfulness to which has been added a pinch of sorrow. Pour with tender care into small, clean hearts and let bake until well-matired. Turn out on the surface of society. Humbly invoke God’s blessing, and it will serve all mankind.

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RECIPE #2: How to Preserve Children

1    large grassy field
1    dozen children (including Mark)
2    small dogs
1    pinch of babbling brook
some small pebbles
generous amounts of flowers
lots of sky

Mix the children and dogs well together and put them in the field, stirring constantly. Pour the brook over the pebbles, sprinkle the field with flowers, spread over all a deep blue sky, and bake in a hot sun. Remove and set to cool in a bathtub.

Author Unknown

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If you coulda and you shoulda, you woulda

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night

On the other hand, you have different fingers

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments

BUMPER STICKER: Hang up and drive!

A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather with a certain set of attitudes

What do they ship Styrofoam in?

An oak tree and a reed were arguing about their strength. When a strong wind came up, the reed avoided being uprooted by bending and leaning with the gusts of wind. But the oak tree stood firm and was torn up by the roots.
Aesop

**************
Believe in yourself
and you will always prevail,
Expect the very best
and you will never fail.

Although you may encounter
a great deal of pain,
Anything worth achieving
will require some strain.

So look beyond your struggle
and see success in your endeavor,
For the pain will go away
and your pride will stay forever.

Charlie Remiggio

****************

Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better

To succeed….proceed!

Just remember, once you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed

Years wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul

The world is composed of givers and takers…the takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better

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IF DR SUESS WAS A TECHNICAL WRITER:
Here’s an easy game to play.
Here’s an easy thing to say:

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted ’cause the index doesn’t hash,
Then your situation’s hopeless, and your system’s gonna crash!

You can’t say this?
What a shame sir!
We’ll find you
Another game sir.

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That’s repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall.

And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
‘Cause as sure as I’m a poet, the sucker’s gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy’s getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary risc,
Then you have to flash your memory and you’ll want to ram your rom.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!

Author Unknown

***********************

BUMPER STICKER: Honk if you love peace and quiet

Atheism is a non-prophet organization

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes

No one is listening until you make a mistake

The hardness of the butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard

Always try to be modest. And be proud of it!

***************************

Never give up,
Never lose hope.

Always have faith,
It allows you to cope.

Trying times will pass,
As they always do.

Just have patience,
Your dreams will come true.

So put on a smile,
You’ll live through your pain.

Know it will pass,
And strength you will gain.

Charlie Remiggio

*******************************

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory

99 percent of polititians give the rest a bad name

I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you

God holds each of us by a string. When we sin, we cut the string. But God ties it up again, making a knot. Each time our wrongdoing cuts the string, God ties another knot – drawing us up closer to Him.

********************************

I tried to teach my child with books;
He only gave me puzzled looks.

I tried to teach my child with words;
They passed him by, often unheard.

Desparingly, I turned aside;
“How shall I teach this child?” I cried.

“Come,” said he;
“Play with me!”

Author Unknown

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Don’t belittle…be BIG

Before you put someone in their place, you should put yourself in theirs!

There are a lot of great labor-saving devices available today…however, it seems you have to work awfully hard so you can afford to buy them!

The moment one gives ‘very’ close attention to anything of this world, even a blade of grass, one is overcome with an awesome, indescribably magnificent feeling that only an all-loving, omnipotent God could has created all of this, and continue to keep it all in balance!

Action is the antidote to despair

Day breaks, but never falls; and night falls, but never breaks

The problem with doing nothing is not knowing when you’re finished

Sometimes you have to be silent in order to be heard

***********************

THE ULTIMATE LOVE STORY:
As fate would have it, one evening I found myself at a conference that my friend Bucky Fuller was making a presentation at. I still was in awe of this little man in his eighties, with his clear mind, deep wisdom, and boundless energy. At the end of his talk, we walked together to his airport limousine.

“I’ve got to go to New York City tonight for another presentation,” he said with an anxiousness that I had rarely seen in him.

“You know, Annie’s not doing well. I’m very concerned about her.”

We hugged.

Bucky had once confided to me that he promised his wife Annie to die before she did, so that he could be there in Heaven to welcome her when it was her turn. I took the comment as a hope, not a commitment. Which shows how greatly I underestimated him.

Shortly after his presentation, he was informed that Annie had lapsed into a coma in a hospital in LA. Doctors felt that there was a good chance she would not regain consciousness. Bucky took the first flight he could get. Upon arriving in LA, he went immediately to her bedside. Sitting beside her, he closed his eyes – and quietly died.

Thomas F. Crum

***********************

God doesn’t make orange juice;
God makes oranges!

You can never do a kindness too soon, since you will never know how soon it will be too late!

The ten most powerful two-letter words:
If it is to be, it is up to me

Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job up to others

**********************
A young man once asked God how long a million years was to Him.
God replied, “A million years to me is just like a single second in your time”
Then the young man asked God what a million dollars was to Him.
God replied, “A million dollars to me is just like a single penny to you”
Then the young man got his courage up and asked: “God, could I have one of your pennies?”
God smiled and replied, “Certainly, just a second.”

Author Unknown

*********************

Good enough never is

Anyone can become angry – that is easy…but to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right reason, and in the right way – that is not easy…Right?

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It’s a rare person who doesn’t get discouraged. Whether it happens to us or to an associate we’re trying to cheer up, the answer centers around a trust in God that He will provide — perseverance, courage and patience is the key — He will provide… in His time. Consider this illustration of a man’s life (his age is in parenthesis)

Failed in business (22)
Ran for legislature – defeated (23)
Again failed in business (24)
Elected to legislature (25)
Sweetheart died (26)
Had a nervous breakdown (27)
Defeated for Speaker (29)
Defeated for Elector (31)
Defeated for Congress (34)
Elected to Congress (37)
Defeated for Congress (39)
Defeated for Senate (46)
Defeated for Vice President (47)
Defeated for Senate (49)
Elected President of the US (51)

That’s the life of Abraham Lincoln

*********************

God…grant me patience…and I want it right now!

The will to win is not nearly as important as the will to prepare to win

After a concert, a fan rushed up to famed violinist Fritz Kreisler and gushed:
“I’d give my whole life to play as beautifully as you do”
Kreisler replied, “I did.”

*********************

RESULTS: Choose to have fun!
Fun creates enjoyment;
Enjoyment invites participation;
Participation focuses attention;
Attention expands awareness;
Awareness promotes insight;
Insight generates knowledge;
Knowledge facilitates action;
and
Action yields Results!

Oswald B. Shallow

*********************

If you have a penny and I have a penny and we exchange pennies, you still have one cent and I have one cent. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange ideas, you now have two ideas and I now have ideas

Ideas are a dime a dozen. People who put them into action are priceless

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If you think you’re beaten, you are,
If you think you dare not, you don’t;
If you like to win but think you can’t,
It’s almost certain that you won’t

Life’s battles don’t always go,
To the stronger woman or man;
But sooner or later, those who win,
Are those who think they can.

*********************

Things work out best for those who make the best of the way things work out!

A doctor who had devoted his life to helping the underprivileged lived over a liquor store in the poor section of a large city. In front of the liquor store was a sign reading: “Dr. Williams is upstairs.” When he died, he had no relatives and he left no money for his burial. He had never asked for payment from anyone he ever treated. Friends and patients scraped together enough money to bury the good doctor, but had no money for a tombstone. It appeared that his grave was going to be unmarked until someone came up with a wonderful suggestion. They took the sign from in front of the liquor store and nailed it to a post over his grave. It made a lovely epitaph: “Dr. Williams is upstairs”

“Sir, what is the secret of your success”
“Right decisions”
“And how do you know you make the right decisions”
“Experience”
“And how do you get experience”
“Wrong decisions”

The only place you will find success before work is in the dictionary!

BE the change you want to see in the world

*********************
When you get what you want in your struggle for self,
And the world makes you king for a day;
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself,
And see what that man has to say.

For it isn’t your father or mother or wife,
Whose judgement upon you must pass;
The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life,
Is the one staring back from the glass.

You may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum,
And think you’re a wonderful guy;
But the man in the glass says you’re only a bum,
If you can’t look him straight in the eye.

He’s the fellow to please – never mind all the rest,
For he’s with you clear to the end;
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult task,
If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And gets pats on the back as you pass;
But your final reward will be heartache and tears,
If you’ve cheated the man in the glass.

…Just a reminder…Who is the One that made you in his image?

*********************

THE FENCE
There was a little boy with a bad temper.  His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, to hammer a nail in the back fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Then it gradually dwindled down.  He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.  Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all.  He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.  The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.  The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.  He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence.  The fence will never be the same.  When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.  You can put a knife in a man and draw it out.  It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed.  They lend an ear, they share a word of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us.”

*********************

The Ten Commandments aren’t prefaced with “If you’re in the mood.”

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left but could say, “I used everything you gave me

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